Self Help: Surviving the Bullies

I’m writing this for those girls, boys, and those in between being bullied out there.

Believe me I’ve been there too.  The worst part of bullying happens at school.  Of course you are young and some kinda helpless.  School is the place where you build your self confidence and it is the same place where the bullies try to break your self confidence.

When I was at school (during my teenage years) I don’t understand why some of my classmates loves bullying me.  Duh, I just want to sit in the corner and watch other people or simply just have a moment of my own.  You know I love to think a lot.  The others maybe they just don’t get it but I just want a quiet life at school or anywhere else.

Some say “magsalita ka naman!” (Say something!) or “oh anjan ka pala! (Oh you’re there, but really you dont exist!) and a lot of hurtful words.

My friend say “Bat ka ba kasi tahimik? Inaasar ka tuloy nila.” (Why are so quiet? That’s why they tease you.)

Of course I do talk…to the people that matters and people who makes sense.  I just don’t want to talk to people who talks at the top of their lungs and do some cartwheels at school. That’s just not my thing.

I’m also not good at telling and explaining what I feel.  I just want it this way.  And I don’t seek approval of anyone in everything I do.

There are “It” girls at school though they’re not yet called “It” girls during my time. They’re popular, but for me so what?!  Maybe that’s the thing breaking their mind, they don’t get my attention.  I don’t understand why some people wants too much attention.  I just ignore them because they don’t really matter.  The thing is I don’t envy their popularity.

Then there is this boy who do ridiculous acts in front of me just to annoy me (pretending to strum a guitar and do some degrading facial reaction.) The thing is he is just humiliating himself in front of me.  I think he didn’t know that.  So deep inside my brain I was laughing at him while I give him a poker face.  The poor guy just leave afterwards.

I’ve also seen girls bullying boys by stapling their polo uniform on the chair. How do they find satisfaction in those acts?

During my pre-teen years (elementary actually), some of my classmates steal my pens, pencil, some snatch my pad paper. Well maybe they are just poor that’s why they steal.  Its annoying though.

When I was in grade 1 my classmate keeps on pulling my skirt up.  When you are six years old, that is just devastating. I cried of course, I don’t want to go to school anymore. Thank God there was this one boy classmate who stood up for me and told the bully to stop what he is doing. Alongside I told my mom I don’t want to go to school with a cracking voice. So she talked to my teacher.  Then the bullying stops.

You are being bullied right now, just ignore them.  Don’t even think of yourself as ugly or a wimp.  Because I never thought of myself as ugly or a wimp.  Although looking back at my picture I look funny and skinny.  But the thing is I NEVER look at myself like that.

Some type of bullying are going out of hand, as some people die because of it.  Bullying is now digital, they take it to social media. Just don’t read it, don’t listen to them.  What they’re writing is not about you, its really about themselves.  When they call you “slut”, “faggot”, “wimp”, or they give you a weird name, its not you they’re pertaining to, its themselves.  Why bother? Just unfriend them, its better to have 20 friends in social media than have 500 tortured souls as friends.

MAKE A STAND not just for yourself but also for other people.

How in the world will you make a stand?

  1.  You can tell the bullies in their face how evil they are and God can see everything they do;
  2. You talk to your parents / teacher / guidance councilor / friends / siblings about the person bullying you so they can take action. That’s not being a wimp or a coward! Its being strong and courageous.  Remember God wants you to be courageous. (Deuteronomy 31:6 “Be strong and courageous.  Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you.”)
  3. Now if you can’t talk to them (parents, teacher, etc) just IGNORE the bullies just like what I did before.  Their brains got broken everyday for trying to bully me and I just turn my pretty head away from them or give them a poker face. IT WILL FREAK THEM OUT MORE THAN THEY FREAK YOU OUT from their bullying.  Come to think of it they just want your quiet and comfortable life.  They just want to take it away from you.

That quiet and comfortable life is yours not theirs.  Don’t let them claim it.  They are the fool, they are the wimp, they are the weakling.  Not you! So get up and forget about them. You have a quiet, lovely, and comfortable life to live.

I’m now 35 years old. Looking back at those years, I just give it a grin.  So don’t let the bullies eat you.  Don’t give up your life because of them.

I survived it, you can too.

From now on, have a God-given sparkling beautiful life.

Ps.  This is Betty the butterfly.  Once she was a caterpillar but now she is a beautiful butterfly.

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